Nothing happens in a Vaccum

 Guys...when I reminisce about those days gone by, I can still see that proverbial hidden man made "Human eating Machine" that most Empires have constructed as some kind of divine system that demands constant lubrication of all its gears with human lubricants. I can see that the Machines appetite is never satisfied, but is very efficient in the production its leaders demand from it. From the Machines founding to the present, it has never been turned off, not even for holidays. Nothing has really changed at all from those ancient days, not even the hustle and bustle among those trying to acclimate just to survive. Remember when dad's weekly income came with fringe benefits, and mom didn't have to work outside of the house. But it was still hard going then as it is now. Nothing was ever easy and it's still not easy today. And Company fringe benefits for most in this generation of workers are mostly neo lithic bones now. And for me trying to make sense of why do some people always have to work in the rock quarries per se and break and carry the stones daily under all kinds of circumstances just didn't seem right. For me it seemed The System was rigged against some people for some reason. Especially when it seemed that a whip cracking on their backs was not the returns they expected for their labor in building the City. I couldn't understand how some people could take such humiliation on a daily basis. I remember when I would see my dad at work and he would kowtow to his White supervisors, I told myself that I would never grow up to be like him. I told myself as a kid that I was gonna be like Al Capone or someone like that. However, I have learned my lessons in life the hard way and I truly regret my life as a criminal in some way. I don't regret it completely because I got to see how the system is rigged. For example, I remember in the early 1970 and '71 at my grandma Florencia, it rained so hard for days. Well, for some reason the city officials and water Dam Regulators were allowed to open up the dam nearby to keep it from flooding up the river where wealthier people lived. The once beautiful San Marcos River was less than 1000 feet away from my grandma's house, and the water that was released drained through Purgatory Creek into the river. Purgatory Creek ran between the Mexican Barrios and Black neighborhood named Dunbar. So when the river and creek flooded, it wasn't good for the poor folks in prime land where we used to be. And right after these two floods passed, "Urban Renewal sent Mexican American leaders" into our communities and asked family owners to sell their properties because the City was gonna condemn these shanty homes under Imminent Domain. Therefore all those closest to the river where my grandma was... had no choice but to move. Talk about don't ever let a good crisis go to waste, here is a fine example. Nonetheless, the City had announced in Public that a beautiful Park was to be built there instead. Although my grandparents were paid some money by Urban Renewal, they took that money and bought a house where it had been predominantly a White community just above the river on a small hill. But now they were in debt with a new house mortgage. And many Mexican families under this plan moved to this neighborhood that was once White peoples'. However, many White people who once lived here where my grandparents were moving to got better deals from this and they moved. Further, other Mexican families had to go further out and buy homes in the county areas. And our Mexican community was displaced forever. And guess what guys, remember the beautiful exotic park the City promised to build in what used to be what we Chicanos in San Marcos called El Barrio del Jorovo, "A beautiful business Park." And do you know why they called this Barrio "El Jorovo", because mostly everyone who lived here were Hunched Back from picking too much cotton and other low to the ground crop for many years. That's what happens to human beings' bodies when they are worked to the bone day and night for meager wages. I wondered also, what happens to the human mind, soul, and spirit under these terrible circumstances? And please guys, don't overlook owing half your check to the company store every payday. Thank "God" for the Good people who were truly generous during these hard times. And I am talking about White People too. And in closing, I do have a Letter to Editor from San Marcos that I wrote and was printed years ago with these stories. These are all true stories of my life! And I started picking cotton when I was Six years old. And as time slipped away... and rebellion set in my spirit, in May of 1969, I made Parole from Mountain View State School for Boys in Gatesville, Texas. In total I did 33 months at the Gatesville Reform Schools. My first hitch was from September 21st, 1965 at "Riverside School at Company A-3 " just as it had started to be integrated. Man what an experience this was. I was Paroled from Riverside in June 1966. On September 22nd, 1966 through mid 1967 I was at Hill Top School at Louisiana Hall on my second hitch. From Hill-Top I was taken to a Maximum Security School named Mountain View and I was assigned at Dorm-10 for attempting many escapes and fighting. As I said, nothing happens in a vacuum. And I made the decision to fight The System and their Laws; and they indirectly opened my eyes to Civil Disobedience the righteous way; or do more time. And it was here at Gatesville Reform School during this era that I personally encountered the true definition of Cruel and Unusual Punishment. Man o man, what a Thesis or Dissertation those stories would have made. Everything has a reason and a purpose and your story is important too. Whether one believes in Divine Providence or not, one has to ask, why does history repeat itself over and over! Believe it or not, there is a reason, and it is mind blowing. I am not a Bible Thumper, that is not my style for teaching. But when one is isolated whether intentionally or not and regardless if one is seeking visions or not, the mind will conjure up questions because we have been created to be creators just like our "Maker." We are not gods or eternal, however, why is that you have those strong urges to stitch, cook, paint, build, write, and talk, etc.. And just like the computer, if you ask it a question it will search endlessly for that answer just for you. Well, your mind is a computer too and it is powerful. And your mind will search endlessly for your answers also, even while you sleep. And your answer may come in the form of a dream when least expected. Didn't I greet all of you reading this blog, "Greetings all you blogger out there in the four corners of reality." Well the dream realm is reality too. There is a physical realm, that's a reality. The conscious realm is a reality, and last the spirit of the human is a reality. And all these are operating at the same time. And I pushed myself out there into these other realms to find answers because I needed to know why did man create that Great invisible insatiable terrorizing evil Machine that wanted to destroy people like me, and hated us without a Cause. I also wanted to know why I was being treated so bad. And why do I feel so sad? And do you see that just borrowed sayings from Geronimo, Pop's Staples, And the Group Moby. This proves that nothing happens in a vacuum. And last, as you look at the picture of me below..., maybe that's why they hate me? Good grief Ruben stop vato, it's almost midnight! Let's call it a night and let us sleep on that. Thanks again guys.                                                                          Respectfully,                                                                                     Ruben Natal Gutierrez