A bad omen of things to come in Vietnam

      Bloggers out there; those with radars fine tuned to hear and see what lurks around you, I know how you feel. Nobody wants to be caught of guard especially when you are paying for high priced security for yourself and those who you love. I believe that we should be familiarized and informed by our security system and personnel that tax us to no end, whether or not we are safe to walk about or not. Well, I felt let down by my security system when I was Institutionalize in this or that place because none of these guys ever bothered to inform me about the Politics governing the system. Man, those Politics are dangerous when one is ignorant about how they are played and about who gets to make the rules. As a work ant all I knew how to do was just follow orders and don't question nothing or no one in authority because it would go bad on me. And so at every level of learning, whether the easy or hard way, I lagged behind trying to make sense of this life of mine and that one out there. I remember clearly; based on my limited experience as a poor Mexican living in Central Texas in the 1950's, of trying to understand why American White people were fighting and hating against each other, and why they were protesting against the American Government and the War in Vietnam on a Military base at Fort Lewis, Washington. Here I am desiring only to be Patriotic for a change, and for the first time in my life in training, Trainees were deserting in the middle of the night and high tailed it out of there. And out in America, young people were dodging the Draft. What do you think is going through my mind as I stare at all these incongruent contradictions about my false assumptions about White people flashing by me everyday. Then to arrive in Vietnam specially groomed like the spit shined Parade Soldier and walk into a Replacement Unit with loose dress code policies. And that's not all, I thought that the Hippie environment was okay for when one was on a pass to downtown or nearest city in Seattle, Washington. I remember while in Seattle seeing young Native American Indian guys who were tall, slim, handsome, and had long hair, dancing to psychedelic music in night clubs. And they danced like they were still dancing around a huge camp fire back in those wild wild days. It was beautiful to see at night and being half drunk myself too. But, why bring that environment to a Military Base? At the 90th Replacement I was never approached by anyone offering me dope or prostitutes. If those things were available, they did a great job of keeping that information from me. And all the days that I was there I suspected nothing here other than they were more free from the hard core discipline back at the States here. Then my Orders came down and I was assigned to the 1st of the 9th First Cavalry Unit, but because This Unit was standing down and going home, I was attached to The 3rd of the 17th Air Cavalry First Aviation Brigade with Bravo Troop. At that time in 1970 this Unit was based at Dion, Vietnam. Dion is pronounced with a Z like in "Zion." This was a Platoon size operation and I was proud to be with The 1st Aviation Brigade because these guys were Scouts and Hunters in Helicopters. They moved a lot and so we had to go wherever they had to go. Our mission for the most part was Reconnaissance and rescuing downed personnel who had been shot down by enemy fire or malfunctioning choppers. Our mission was to locate the enemy using stealth and also searching for supply caches. These guys on choppers were always in extreme danger once up in that open air. And that is where we were most of the time when we had to go out on patrols. We also worked with other units who did the same things as we did. Those units that I saw more often were people from the 25th Infantry, The Big Red One, The 11th Cavalry, and Recon units from the 75th Rangers. And our area of operations was at Three Corps Region. There were times we had to go out at nights and rescue crew members from helicopters that were shot down over the jungle. Pilots were killed and trying to get them medivac was hard intensive labor because we had to clear trees for easier transport of these guys out of there. There are skeptics who say that an M-60 machine gun cannot cut down trees, but we did it. I was a machine gunner and carried an m-60. An like I said, being on helicopters is nice especially when you are tired of ground pounding, but you don't know when something is gonna go wrong. Sometimes after the end of an operation as we were picked up, the rice farmers would open up on us as we were taking off with their Ak -47s. So really, no one knew who was friendly or unfriendly. And at other times as we were coming for landings the helicopters malfunctioned and they had no hydraulics. At times it was worst, either a transmission or engine malfunctioned. You ever been in one? I am just glad that I was never thinking about these things and all I thought about was the break down in morale and discipline here in Vietnam. The Vietnamese Viet Cong soldiers were bad ass but, we Americans had to worry more about our own soldiers. All those revolutions back home were being fought in Vietnam too. Good grief, many soldiers died at the hands of other soldiers. I saw senior N.C.O.'s and Officers who were afraid to give direct commands to some of these G. I. 's because these guys were angry at The American Politicians, The War, The games they were playing in not winning the war, and they were also high on drugs which made them dangerous. You should have seen these guys who were fully armed to the Ying-Yang and they were tired of taking shit for orders. The fragging was real here guys. The Blacks were angry, The Whites were angry, hell everybody was angry! And dope was dirt cheap considering for the purity of it. When I was there, no one could stop the dope from flowing in. Many guys just up an O.D. on bases or Fire Bases. Remember the movie the Deer Hunter and Apocalypse Now, it was like that when I was there. The Military was far gone down in a wild uncontrollable free fall. Discipline was gone! I don't remember any inspections and there was no semblance of the spit shine and polished G. I. Joe here. At the bigger permanent bases, the night life or day life was crazy. Prostitutes walked on base freely and some of their Pimps were our N.C.O.'s. Damn these Vietnamese girls and women were beautiful! Inflation was high in America, but not here. Everything was inexpensive and affordable. And to be honest guys, The "Jesus" Revolution had not yet reached us here but it was waiting for me at Avenue "D" in Killeen, Texas at Fort Hood. And yes guys I hate to admit it because Charles Dickens was right, these were the best of times but also the worst of times. People were dying and we didn't want to admit it but we knew that we had lost the war then. When we factor all the thousands of American and Vietnamese Babies that were born and left there, and factor in all those who Over Dosed and those who were killing each other who were Americans, and the loss of the great American G.I. Joe image, it was curtains for us because the World viewed us as the Up Righteous and Just Ones. And here we also see Balaam's Corrupt concept for corruption of a peoples morals had reached the Communist too. And they applied it extremely well. And I already told the story of my severe case of Malaria on Christmas Eve and being given for dead by American Catholic Priest and Army Full Bird Colonel. After my body temperature went of the charts I had severe seizures and went into a coma for almost a couple of weeks. I was put in ice in a horse watering metal truffe. I  also told the story about how I was walking Point one day out in the jungle and a Loh-58 Scout ship flew over me as I was coming into a clearing, and the door gunner opened up on me with his m-60 and almost killed me. Fortunately that I was fast on my feet and I dodged that barrage of bullets from that trigger happy Scout. And I also told the story about a crew chief for a Chinook helicopter who stole a Chinook one evening from the helicopter pads area and killed himself in it in front of all of us there because he had received a Dear John Letter from his girl friend back home. Oh, and don't forget the Venereal diseases and Syphilis that was part of the amenities for having great sex outside of marriage that most all these G.I.'s came across in Vietnam. And don't overlook the smart G.I.'s who shipped dope on Airforce Cargo Planes back home, and also other stolen valuable artifacts and paintings. And we don't know what else. And don't forget that Vietnam made many big time American Corporations and Banks a whole bunch of money! As well as Politicians too. And on October 21st, 1971 I was given Orders to report to The 90th Replacement at Long Binh and there I was quarantined again. Here I was given another surprise or two. One surprise was one that I failed to see the first time here. And that was one that was well hidden by our Military and World News Stations about all the guys who were so strung out on Heroin and Opium that they had to be held over on a delayed going home programed after there year tour there for along time afterwards. And there were many of these sad cases. And the last surprise was the very last night that I was there at the Replacement on October 30th, 1971, when I decided to get my last massage in Vietnam. I was not expecting nothing except a massage with a pretty girl and that was all. Well, when I got there I went and got undressed and placed a white cotton bath towel around my waist and I walked into the opened bay. Then a most stunning and extremely beautiful very young looking and short and petite Vietnamese girl; the prettiest one that I ever saw in Vietnam; but please don't get me wrong, Vietnam had thousands upon thousands of beautiful girls, greeted me and guided me to an empty bed. Remember there are many guys here on their beds too and we are in an opened large room together. Then I lay flat on my stomach and the girl begins to massage me. Then I notice her looking all around anxiously and impatiently and before I knew it, she had got hold of me down below and began playing with me and so I start to look around and most of the guys are with their eyes closed and relaxed, and I am having a blast. Because I just can't believe my fortune for this last night in Vietnam. And when she was done... she smiled at me gleefully, and beautifully, and disappeared. So I went and took my shower and got dressed and went out to the bay to see if she was still there because I was gonna go further with her once she got off that night. But she was gone. So I asked a soldier in charge there, where did she go, and he said that I was her last customer for that night and that she went back to the her barrack where the Massagers stayed. And I asked him if their was sex allowed with them and he said, "Absolutely not, not here at our Replacement." So I persisted and asked if I could just visit with her, and again he said it was against the Rules there. Then I asked him, can they play with us while they massage us, and again he said, "Absolutely not!" Oh!, but I was love sick now; this girl knocked me off my feet, so I went around to her Barrack but I found no way in without running into locked doors. I wanted to see her one more time so badly that night because I wanted to consummate what was started and close this great Chapter in my life in Vietnam having had a great time with this Beauty there!. But, I was happy because at least I knew the young girl was excited to be with me and I was thrilled to have been served by her. So, after giving up the search for her, I went back to my barrack content with the great outcome anyway. The next morning I was boarding a Pan Am again. And I did get to see the Newbies coming in, but I didn't wave at them nor teased or laughed at them. I just felt bad for them. Just like I did with my First Sergeants who drank alcohol too much. Not all of them self medicated like this, but I had a few that did. And they loved me, and I loved them. Let us sleep on that for now guys. There were so many stories to tell about Vietnam, especially about my real close friends. Nevertheless, Vietnam is part of me now, and I am part of them. And I Love it Forever. Amen. Thanks again.                                                                Respectfully,                                                                                                                                             Ruben N. Gutierrez